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So,
where am I now?

Because I could have sworn this road started somewhere.
In another life maybe, still
connected to me only by the offramp taken to get this far

So,
where am I now?

In the eyes of anyone. I am
Every year of every memory of
every person I've ever been.
all swallowed by the thin grey
hours since I could look outside
and see nothing behind me at all.

So,
where am I now?

as Gideon as
my truth unnoticed goes
farther
into the back of the drawer.
just so that some small voice can say
in the aftermath,
there was hope all along.

So,
there I go.

And of course,
it would be
euthanasic to feel so free
to feel the speed
my windshield melting away
giving voice to the night
the weight of the wind against my streaming eyes,
pushing blurred vision to the back of my skull
peeling back lips, tearing at the tongue
screaming louder still dissolving bliss and skin
teeth and bone erode to dust
shattering and shimmering
suspended behind me


The highway consumes my reminders of what could return,
dormant in my marrow,
and leaves in the world
just one more stranger.